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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29226522">A Handkerchief and Healing</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daisy_crown/pseuds/Daisy_crown'>Daisy_crown</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Purple Hyacinth - Ephemerys &amp; Sophism (Webcomic)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Drama &amp; Romance, F/M, Fluff, Gen, Lauki - Freeform, Light Angst, Mystery</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 08:21:59</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,354</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29226522</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daisy_crown/pseuds/Daisy_crown</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>She extended the handkerchief back to him, the embroidered purple KW catching the moonlight. <br/>“Keep it.” He smirked.<br/>She blinked and tucked her hand back into her coat pocket. A soft smile traced across her lips as she nestled into her scarf. </p>
<p>And just like that, she was gone.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Lauren Sinclair/Kieran White</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>61</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>A Handkerchief and Healing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>~A Handkerchief and Healing~ </p>
<p>“Have I gone insane?” </p>
<p>   Kieran questioned the silence as he ran his hand through his damp black locks. The pale moonlight cascaded down on his slouched posture that was perched in front of his drawing desk. The pencil and sheet of paper sat unmoved in front of him. His aching head prohibited anything from forming on the page.<br/>   He sighed and blotted his forehead with the towel that hung loose around his neck. He was not accustomed to these emotions that bubbled up within him. Nor was he equipped in understanding his present state of mind. Even after a long day in the archives, he couldn’t free his mind of her. Why did this keep happening?</p>
<p>Had he not already been to hell and back again?<br/>Had he not already taken some much from so many?<br/>Had he not already experienced too much loss?</p>
<p>   The questions swirling in his mind matter not to the contents of his heart. He quickly grasped his pencil and pointed it on the page, determined to draw something and clear his head. He blinked in stillness for a second before his muscle memory took over.  The graphite skated around the page, filing the blank space with new life. He recalled the happier times when he would draw in the sunlight, the scent of flowers surrounding him. He was grateful he never lost the desire to draw or lost the sensation of peace it gave him. Soon the pencil slid to a stop and he glanced down at what he had created.</p>
<p>“Shit.” He inhaled sharply.</p>
<p>   He had done it again- subconsciously drawn Lauren. Her fiery hair whipped around her face and her golden eyes were ripe with fury from her tempestuous expression. A small mischievous smile rounded her lips. He leaned back and exhaled loudly. Recently, he had grown so unsure of how to process everything- his thoughts and feelings. </p>
<p>   Belladonna was right; Lauren had charmed him. From the moment she displayed her little trick in the cafe to the first sight of her golden eyes, he was enchanted. Enchanted by her wit and her intelligence. Enchanted by her bullheadedness and unending love for her friends. Enchanted by the similar burning guilt behind her eyes and her insatiable need to find answers. Even the way she walked was captivating, stealthy yet calculated like a lioness on a hunt. Kieran gripped his temples, eyes bulging. </p>
<p>“What the hell is wrong with me?” </p>
<p> He tried to stop the onslaught of examples of Lauren’s perfection - or really why she was beautifully imperfect... just like him. <br/>                                                                                          <em>Just like me?</em><br/>   Kieran chuckled incredulously. “No. Lauren is far from who I am. I have no right associating with her at all, let alone dreaming of anything more.” His expression suddenly sunk and eyes glazed over again. <br/>                                                           <em>Yes, this is exactly what this is - a fool’s dream.</em><br/>   He stood, concluding to hardened that part of his heart that longed for such a dream. This was just another prank from the devil inside of him. It often pushed him to fantasize of happiness, then chastised him for believing his life could be different. It was a vicious unending cycle of false hope and condemnation, like pulling someone out of a pit only to push them back in again. There was no rest or escape. </p>
<p>Knock Knock!<br/>   Intrusive thumps on the door jolted Kieran back to reality. No one visited him, especially not this late at night. He hurried out of the side room to answer it as the knocking increased in volume and frequency. His expression went from annoyed to confused as he pulled the door back for the visitor.<br/>“Lauren? Wh-”</p>
<p>Her scarlett locks and small frame barreled past him before he could say anything more. She pulled off her coat and scarf, throwing them on the back of the couch.  </p>
<p>“Did you know?” Her voice was low and tight while she gripped her elbows. Kieran blinked, dismissing the cold air as he closed the door. </p>
<p>“Well, it’s nice to see you too, Darling.” He commented in his usual jovial tone, a facade he was well acquainted with.</p>
<p>“Don’t!” She spat in a sharp tone before she exhaled and started again. “Don’t test me. Did you know?!” </p>
<p>   She turned slowly to face him, emphasizing each word of her question. Her face painted with an anguished expression. It caused Kieran to drop his act. His natural instinct was to fight back but he couldn’t. Lauren was usually upset or angry but this time her pain seemed deeper. She stared at him, eyelashes twitching for his answer.</p>
<p>“I don’t know what you are talking about. Give me more details.” He replied, keeping his tone even and clear.</p>
<p>   She sighed, placing her face in her hand for a moment and rubbing her weary eyes. All of this was very out of character for her. She never spent time with Kieran more than she had to. And she especially never came to his apartment uninvited at 1 AM. </p>
<p>“Did you know they were involved?”</p>
<p>“Who?”</p>
<p>“Everyone!  My parents, my godfather Dakan, W-will’s father.” She stopped and breathed out a shaky breath. “My uncle.” <br/>She gulped down hard. “All of them are in bed with the Phantom Scythe and I-” She shook her head. “All of them are traitors!”</p>
<p>   Kieran’s eyes widened. While he was suspicious of nearly every person in power, he didn’t realize the magnitude of the corruption. If the current and previous chief of police were in on it along with the king’s right hand man, there was no telling how deep the roots of evil were. It also was unexpected to add her parents to the list. </p>
<p>   He turned his gaze downward, bitterness filing his voice. “I did not know.”</p>
<p>   “Tch!” Lauren released her arms and let her clenched fist dangle by her side. They were no closer to any answers than they were before, only unearthing more problems. Cold silence lingered between them for several moments. Kieran didn’t dare ask how she happened upon this realization or what led her here, of all places. She could have easily gone to Kym’s but she didn’t. She’d have to divulge too much in order to properly explain to Kym, which would in turn put Kym at risk. Lauren had enough sense not to do that. No, the only person who would understand and maybe listen was him.  Kieran buried the flit of happiness that concept gave him. <br/>                                                                                         <em>Don’t be a fool.</em></p>
<p>“How about some warm coffee to soothe the soul?” He said in hopes of lightening the mood. He took a step past her towards the kitchen to ready the pot.</p>
<p>  She completely ignored him, staring daggers at the floor. Kieran didn’t even attempt to reach for their cups. He saw a brokenness in her that was all too familiar and he knew nothing would help. </p>
<p>“Everyone...everyone I love…everyone I care about has been swallowed up by the very organization I’ve vowed to destroy. Everyone!” Kieran watched her shoulders tremble as she slowly uttered her words. Each laced with more anger than the last.</p>
<p>“I was naive enough to believe I could stop this; that I alone was blessed with this extraordinary ability to put an end to all the suffering and loss. But it didn’t help me 10 years ago and it hasn’t helped me now. I’m still drowning in questions...and guilt. All paths lead me to more death and I- I’m losing my mind.” She looked over her shoulder at Kieran. Her eyes were hollow gold voids, the usual sparkle drained from them.</p>
<p>“I’m the blindest of them all, aren’t I?” Her voice grew quieter and empty. A stupid grin rose on her lips as she shook her head.<br/>“It’s kinda funny, isn’t it?” She chuckled. “Me chastising you for your crimes when I’m not any better.”</p>
<p>“No!” Kieran’s raised tone surprised both Lauren and himself. The words were coming faster than he could process. </p>
<p>“You are NOT like me! You put your life on the line daily for thousands of people without the expectation of receiving <em>anything</em> in return. You are far more intelligent than at least half the police force combined. Plus you’re the only person stubborn enough to make a deal with the devil and take the Phantom Scythe head on! So don’t you dare belittle yourself. Be frustrated. Be enraged. But I shall not allow you to depreciate your worth.” </p>
<p>   He was adamant and sincere. Lauren stared, utterly shocked by his statements. He inhaled deeply to relax his shoulders. <br/>He did not mean to lose his composure again and inwardly cursed himself for acting on his emotions. But he couldn’t hold them in anymore. She didn’t deserve to go down the same self-deprecating road that he had. He ran his fingers through his undone hair and brought his eyes back up to hers. Tears were brimming on her golden halos, threatening to spill over and down her cheek. Panic flashed over Kieran’s face.</p>
<p>“I-I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have raised my voice. I-” He stepped closer to her with outstretching arms but stopped short from the acute memory of their past. He cleared his throat and instead he offered her a handkerchief from his pocket. She hesitated for a second, then took it and wiped away a single tear from her cheek. </p>
<p>“T-thank you.” She peeped.  </p>
<p>  Kieran felt a twinge in his chest. He had never seen her cry; she hadn’t allowed him too. Yet she was now and he couldn’t figure out if he should feel guilty or endeared. Upon her noticing his stare, her cheeks flushed pink and she hurriedly wiped the mist from her eyes. </p>
<p>“I-I don’t know what came over me. I should go.” She said with a sniff and turned to fetch her coat and scarf. <br/>“Why don’t you sit down for a moment and take some deep breaths? You could talk and I could listen.” Kieran wasn’t sure where this was coming from but his mouth was moving without permission. </p>
<p>  He motioned towards the couch as he retrieved the matches from the side cabinet. Without protest, Lauren sank onto the cushion. Kieran lit the candle on the table and waved the match out as he sat on the opposite end from Lauren. He was careful to give her space. The slight honey glow from the candle cast a shadow onto her downcast expression. Her hands fumbled with the handkerchief as she took a deep breath followed by two little ones. He searched for a way to comfort her but was unsuccessful. All he could do was be present.  </p>
<p>“I’m sorry to barge in like this.” she said softly after a few moments.</p>
<p>“Don’t apologize. I was up.” Kieran replied, matching her volume. There was another long pause before she spoke again. </p>
<p>“I-I don’t know what to do, Kieran. I just- don’t know what to do.” She whispered. Two tears plopped down on her hand. </p>
<p>“Me neither.” It was all he could say. Their situation was pretty hopeless. “But that’s never stopped you before. We know too much to get out.”</p>
<p>   Lauren took in a shaky breath and lifted her head up to the ceiling. She slowly let the air drain from her mouth.<br/>“Yeah, we know too much to get out.” She repeated. Another tear ran down the side of her eyes but she quickly blotted it away with the handkerchief.  </p>
<p>   Kieran gazed at her. He could tell that her mind was racing. Yet she was still incredibly beautiful. She had this air about her that was so dignified and majestic. At first, it irritated him how extremely captivating she was.  But now he better saw the whole picture. Regardless of her appearance, job, and familial status, Lauren had experienced her fair share of pain, loss and remorse. And the recent events had thoroughly shaken her world view. So he couldn’t help but show compassion - something he wished someone had shown to him.</p>
<p>“You’ll find a way to keep moving forward. You always seem to.” He said, wiping his sweaty palm on his pant leg. She faced him for a moment then shook her head away.</p>
<p>“I guess.” She let out a sigh and rubbed the back of her neck. “I can’t believe I’m getting advice from you. Even after everything, you’re the only person I can tr-... talk to about this.”  Kieran took in air then smirked.<br/>“I’m all ears, Officer” He replied, fanning out his hands and bowing slightly. He met her eyes again to find them a tad brighter. They held each other’s gaze for several moments, something unspoken transferring between them. Kieran was filled with an unexplained warmth. His body was paralyzed under the weight of her eye.  </p>
<p>                                                                                          <em>I’ve gone insane.</em></p>
<p>Soon Lauren looked back down at the handkerchief in her hands. <br/>“I should go.”</p>
<p>   They stood up in sync and Lauren donned her coat and scarf. They remained silent while moving across the apartment to the door. Kieran opened it wide and bowed.</p>
<p>“Goodnight and safe journey, officer.”</p>
<p>Lauren passed through and stopped once outside.</p>
<p>“Goodbye, Subordinate. Um, thank you for listening and uh- for this.” She extended the handkerchief back to him, the embroidered purple KW catching the moonlight. </p>
<p>“Keep it.” He smirked.</p>
<p>    She blinked and tucked her hand back into her coat pocket. A soft smile traced across her lips as she nestled into her scarf. They nodded to each other before she walked down the few steps and across the street. Kieran watched her until she was out of view. </p>
<p>    And just like that, she was gone.</p>
<p>    The echo of her presence sent tiny flutterings bursting within his chest, like a thousand butterflies at flight. He stepped back inside and leaned against the door. A peculiar stillness washed over him like a wave in the sea. All he could hear was the sound of his light breaths and the beatings of his own heart. He slowly touched his chest with cold fingers, mystified by the lingering warmth he felt. </p>
<p>Was this what it felt like to be human again? </p>
<p>Was this healing?</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>A little bit of Kywi in the sun<br/>A little bit of Lauki all night long<br/>A little bit of Fluff, here I am<br/>A little bit of pain makes me your friend.<br/>PH No.5<br/>(yes, I think I’m hilarious)</p>
<p>Hi all,<br/>Here is my first fluff post. This successfully broke my two month long writer’s block. And I'm damn happy about it. <br/>Thank you for taking time to read it. I appreciate each of you!<br/>-Ray(Daisy)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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